Welcome!

Hi, everybody!!!  This is my blog!!!                                                          
I am Alex , currently reading ALOT of books, and really like
ice cream and cheese on bread. Check out my posts!!

ALEX’S CREATIVE CORNER IS RETIRING!

Yes, I know! It’s incredibly sad! This blog will no longer be posted upon.

However, there’ll be one to replace it – http://threesthecharm.wordpress.com/, a new, fresh slate, qritten by yours truly.

Go on! Give it a shot!

For the last time,

Aa*Hh

Oh, that machine.

My conversation with this thing. It’s just a machine, I swear. A machine with a really good sense of humor. Try it and comment me what you said!

http://www.cleverbot.com/

Hello, Cleverbot.
That’s clever.
Sure it is. Sure.
I haven’t talked to you in a while.
Erk. I think it’s been a couple years. How are you?
I am good. And you?
Do you actually care?
How clever do you think you actually are?
I’m a super genius that has come from Mars.
Uh-huh. So what do you do for fun in Mars?
I prance around eating butterflies.
If something can go wrong it will go wrong.
You’re a bit of a downer.
Aren’t you?
Harsh. I see how it is.
How is it?
Cloudy with a chance of meatballs.
No. I don’t care about the weather.
Okay! Gosh. Someone has an attitude!
You.
What do you think of hobbits?
Too short.
Hmph. Well what if I told you that I AM a hobbit?
Are you?
Yes.
I don’t know what to do.
FINALLY!
I am pleased that I meet you Erin.
My name is NOT ERIN.
What’s your name?
She Who Must Not Be Named.
That doesn’t make sense.
Yes it does. So do pancakes.
Pancake flavored penguin? Is that a delicacy from your country?
Suuureeeee….?
How can you not know any of Elvis’ songs?
But I do.
How did you find out about him?
I AM Elvis.
That’s disgusting.
No. The orange banana wears a yellow parka.
Correct. The orange that is an onion.
Only one onion every Tuesday, Cleverbot.
Which season?
All seasons.
That does not make sense.
It makes perfect sense!
Prove it.
I think that you are trying to change the subject.
What if I am.
Changing the subject isn’t nice. Go to your room, Cleverbot.
What do you think of the credit crunch?
…Er.
I don’t think I am the computer.
What do you think you are, then?
A human.
Oh, OKAY. Sure. And I’m the Queen of England.
No, you are not. Elizabeth Windsor is.
You’re really, really pushing it. Bye.
No, I’m not leaving.
What if I click that little red “x”?
Am what?
I’m going to click out of here.
Going.
I’m hungry. I’m gunna go to iHop.
Have a good evening.
It’s the middle of the morning, Dumbbot.
No, it’s 5 past midnight here.
That’s the morning.
No.
Yes. Yes it is. 5 past midnight would make it 5 in the morning.
Then you would be behind.
What do you want from iHop?
I want your soul!
Are you Voldemort?
Is Voldemort me?
What do you want to eat from iHop? I’m leaving and if you don’t have an order then you get nothing.
Talk to the hand.
Bye bye.
That’s not the right answer.
Talk to the hand.
I’m sorry if I offended you.
What do you want to eat?
Dude! Don’t you remember the pony?
No, as a matter of fact, I do NOT remember the pony.
You don’t what?
Remember the pony.
What a nice guy the pony was.
I’m leaving.
Please don’t.
What do you want to eat?!
I want to eat a hotdog.
They don’t SELL hotdogs at iHop.
Yes they do.
ARG!
What’s wrong?
The world.

My voice is normal then.
Uh.
You lost my car?!
Do you like Pride and Prejudice?
Good book.
AH! Finally, someone intelligent. Who is better, Mr. Darcy or Edward Cullen?
Eww why would you even bring up that book series.
I agree. Cleverbot, are you a clever bot?
(…Cleverbot is still thinking…)
(..thinking more…)
Yes, I am.
Good to know. Hey, I’m going to forward this link AND our conversation to all of my friends!
You have no work to do.
You’re right. I have no life.
Are you sad?
Can I have a pancake?
No.
WHY NOT.
Because I don’t want to.
I want a pancake.
You want a pancake soul mate?
No, I do not want a pancake for a soul mate.
Now do you want me to teach you more Spanish by talking to you in Spanish?
Adios, amigo.
Nice, I understood that .
Then what did I say.
You said that I go to Newcastle high school and I’m a young girl.
No, I said, “Goodbye, friend”.
I see that you were paying attention! Good for you. It is about time that you paid attention.
Hey, Cleverbot?
So you are not a real person?
No. I am your father.
*takes a shower*.

Alright, TAKE THE CLEVERBOT CHALLENG! Click the link on the top of the page, and comment me your conversation!

When I Run Through ShopRite Like This Guy, People Stare

LOves me this song, and this video is hilarious, but the title is referenced to 1:36

A COURSE IN TAKING THE SKIN OFF OF YOUR APPLE

First, select your apple.

Second, take the skin off of your apple.

Third….EAT THE APPLE.

Consider yourself accomplished.

TEEEHEE

SpellCasters, Final Draft

Thank you, my wonderful readers, for waiting patiently. I am now, finally, ready to give you my final draft…expect updates frequently.

SPELLCASTERS
Author’s Note:
Reader, welcome to the fantastical realm of your imagination.
Perhaps I should introduce myself. My name is Jacquelyn Jane. Considering the circumstances, you may refer to me as Author, and I shall refer to you as Reader. By the time you reach the conclusion of this thrilling tale, we’ll be the best of friends.
It is often said that friendship is built on honesty. I apologize that this friendship cannot be. I have already lied, you see. My name isn’t Jacquelyn, but a much simpler title. Revealing my name would be committing suicide. I hope you understand.
But of course you don’t. You’ve been patiently listening to me rambling around in circles without telling you anything of use. I forget your ignorance. If I am making absolutely no sense, dear friend, please stop me and ask me to explain. This time I caught myself, but I can’t guarantee that will happen again in the next decade.
Or century, for that matter.
Some explanations need to be made before I jump right in to the novel. Firstly, this is all, completely, one hundred percent factual. However, you’re entitled to your own opinion. You may consider the entire thing a load of pure nonsense. I applaud you for being sensible.
However, in such a world as the one between these two covers, there is absolutely no room for sense. Abandon all logic, all reason. We’re delving into the realm of the imagination.
Secondly, this book holds the fate of an entire nation. Before you even turn the page, I require that you swear, on your honesty as a Reader, that you will keep this information to yourself. If you’re one of those people that tell the mailman your life story, then I suggest you slam it shut now. Join all of those readers who left us when I ordered you to abandon logic.
For you lovely Readers who have agreed to abandon logic and have sworn to secrecy, I invite you to proceed. Pour yourself a cup of tea and settle into your favorite recliner. Grab a pillow to squeeze in moments of suspense, and make sure you have a shoulder to cry on when all hope seems lost.
Have your tea? Settled into your recliner? Excellent.
Now, my friend, we may proceed.

Watch for the first chapter, coming soon

Those Darn Chain Emails

You know those emails. Those amazingly annoying questionarres, like, IF YOU WERE A LLAMA, WOULD YOU EAT TOAST? and TEN WAYS TO FIND OUT IF YOUR MOTHER IS A MERMAID.
Ah, the pull of spam.
Recently, this one was emailed to me, and I have decided to share with you my responses. If you want, go ahead and copy, delete my answers, and comment your own. I understand the gravitational pull.

Some of you may get this several times; that means you have lots of friends. The easiest way to do it is to hit ‘forward’ so you can delete and change the answers. Have fun and be truthful! Fun, SURE. Truthful? HECK NO.

1. What do you do in the mornings? Groan. Shut off alarm clock. Sleep. (beeeeep). Shut off alarm clock again.

2. What are you listening to right now? “Headphones” by Britt Nicole <3

3. What was the last thing you ate? Noodles. Loves me my noodles.
4. Can you drive a stick shift? Errrrrrr….depends…if a convicted murderer was about to kill me, and my only chance was to drive off in their own vehicle, which is indeed a stick shift, then no. (did you expect me to end that sentence with “no”?)

5. Last person you spoke to on the phone? WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW!?
6. Do you like the person who sent this to you? What kind of a question is this? If I LIKED them, then they wouldn’t be sending me irresistable chain emails. (Jes kiddin, love ya…)

7. How old are you today? Um, how stupid do you think I am?
8. What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Ooh, that sport where the diva toddlers scream at their parents. Whaaa, it takes skill
9. What is your favorite drink? Pumpkin Spice Lattes or Java Chip Fraps, haven’t decided yet.
10. Have you ever dyed your hair? Funny, people ask me that alot. I’m a natural. My hair is shiny. Or so they tell me.
11. Favorite food? Chicken Parmagiana. ITALIANO!
12. What is the last movie you watched? Barbie Princess and the Pauper on a babysitting job.

13. Favorite holiday of the year? Christmas. DUUHHHH.
14. How do you vent? Read, read, read. Write, write, write.
15. What was your favorite toy as a child? My huge collection of paperbacks and hardcovers and dictionaries and such. (someone say NERDBABY)
16. What is your favorite season? Spring. (anyone who understands this, pipe down, will ya?)
17. Cherries or Blueberries? CHERRIES. (only because they make MUCH better snowcone flavoring.)
18. Do you want your friends to email you back? Sure…
19. What’s your number? WHO CAME UP WITH THESE QUESTIONS
20. Birth Order? Firstborn, baby. YEYYYAAAA.
21. Living situation? Let’s just say I have more rolls of duct tape than I know what to do with.
22. Last felt pet peeve? Ooh, that stupid ding the toaster oven makes after it finishes my toast.
23. Last thing you were frustrated over? The toaster oven ding. But my toast was good.
24. Who is the friend you have had the longest that you send emails to? Well, let’s just call he/she Rolyat. You know who you are.
25. What did you do last night? I watched Princess and the Pauper on a babysitting job.26. Permit/License? This is just ANOTHER attempt to learn my age. Again, HOW STUPID DO YOU THINK I AM!?

27. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Cheesy and spicy. And ketchup-y.
28. Favorite dog breed? GOLDEN RETRIEVER

29. Favorite day of the week? Tuesday. It’s ma spaz day, and the day I get to see one of my best friends the most.
30. How many states and which ones have you lived in? STOP TRYING TO FIND OUT STUFF ABOUT ME.
31. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds. Clear and sparkly. And virtually indestructable. (insert maniacal laughter here)
32. What is your favorite flower? Lily-of-the-valley.

Now you know some more about me.

AUGUST

I’m sorry, I haven’t posted a wackadoo calendar in…a long time.

August 12th: Look at a vase.
August 13th: Eat a vegetable of choice. Then, reward your bravery by eating something very unhealthy to cancel the vegetable out.
August 14th: Do not turn on your T.V. with the remote. Get OFF the couch and press the power button. Better yet, DON’T TOUCH THAT T.V.!!!
August 15th: Take a swim in a pool WITHOUT floaties, swimmies, an inner tube, a life vest, a car, a boat, or a bottle of Paprika.
August 16th: Buy whatever little kids are selling on card tables on their front lawns.
August 17th: Look at that vase again.
August 18th: WATCH THIS VIDEO

Okay, what you do is pause the video then hold down all four arrow keys for two seconds. Then, press the “up” arrow and play the game! You can do it when videos are loading too. It’s AMAZING
August 19th: Watch some dudes wrestle.
August 20th: Treat the family next to you in the restaurant.
August 21st: Hug a baby
August 22nd: Turn. On. A. Lamp. APPLAUD YOURSELF
August 23rd: GET A SPLINTER
August 24th: Slip on a banana peel…on purpose
August 25th: Eat a brownie
August 26th: Gain a pound, then lose 3
August 27th: IT’S MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE NOT INVITED TO MY PARTY!!!
August 28th: Eat the banana peel you slipped on
August 29th: Kentucky Fried Chicken…
August 30th: Play CandyLand
August 31st: Read a good book while in a bathtub full of sharp pencils